It's hard putting away your old habits and trying to move forward with your life but it's even more of a challenge seeing everyone doing what you once used to do.
I mean I was always the party girl, always happy to get out of the house and stuff ( I'm not a drinker or smoker I'm about dancing and having a fun time).
This year I wanted to try something new. This being my last year of high school I wanted to be more focused so I can do excellent on my SATs and hopefully get into an ivy league school (my biggest dream).
It's hard seeing everyone living the life I once used to live: balancing grades, sleep and social time.
Now for me it's just grades and sleep..
My life is so different now, I barely talk to the people I once used to. I know it seems bad but I just really don't wanna lose focus. I just need to be balanced this year get into a great university and then I can start over and try new things. I mean I do have basically the rest of my life to party and have fun for now that's just not my motive.
I must say it sucks going on Facebook and seeing everyone in pictures from the party last night. It does crush me inside to see the boy of my dreams in a picture with my worst enemy. It's hard but it's life. Trying to ignore everything around me gets so overwhelming sometimes but I then I think about how happy I'll be if I get a 2200 on my SATs and get into the university of my dreams.
Hopefully it'll all be worth it in the end.
"It does crush me inside to see the boy of my dreams in a picture with my worst enemy." i totally get that. hopefully you'll do well on your SATs and your life gets a little bit easier, a little bit more fun :)
ReplyDeleteDo it! Study hard this year...it's only a year, right? Take it one step at a time. You're so wise to take the time now to study hard. You can totally get into an Ivy League school...even if you don't get in on the first try, try again and again and you'll get in. I got to go to Oxford last year. I never thought it was possible, but I too had to change my ways. I worked hard and realized my dreams. TOTALLY WORTH IT. You are such a smart girl...and guess what...someday you'll find a really smart man who will love you for all the hard work you've done!
ReplyDeleteI think you hit the nail on the head when you spoke about having 'balance' in your life. May things turn out just the way you hope for.
ReplyDelete